THE TEN COMMANDMENTS OF MARRIAGE

 JUST FOR FUN
 

Commandment  1

Marriages  are made in heaven. But so are thunder and lightning.
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Commandment  2

If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to  every word you say; talk in your sleep.
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Commandment  3

Marriage is grand -- and divorce is at least 100 grand!
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Commandment  4

Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of  marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.

In the second  year, the woman speaks and the man listens.

In the third year,  they both speak and the neighbours  listen.
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Commandment 5

When a  man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one  thing: Either the car is new or the wife is.
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Commandment  6

Marriage is when a man and woman become as one. The trouble  starts when they try to decide which one.
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Commandment  7

Before  marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about  something you  say. After marriage, he will fall asleep before you  finish.
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Commandment 8

Every man  wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good  cook.

But the law allows only one wife.
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Commandment  9

Marriage and love are purely matter of chemistry. That is why  wives treat husbands like toxic waste.
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Commandment  10

A man is incomplete until he is married.  After that, he is finished.

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